


Legends Of Insanity and Text Chats

by Lonely_Deer



Category: DC's Legends of Tomorrow (TV)
Genre: F/F, Fluff, Humor, I didn't intend half the warning tags to be added, I don't know why I made this anymore, I just thought this might be kinda funny, I swear the rest of the fic won't be like this, M/M, Ray-centric, Self-harm references (unfortunately), Sex Jokes, Some very slight Angst?, Teen and Up audiences for explicit language, idk - Freeform, sorry for this guys, text chat, this just sort of happened
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-04-03
Updated: 2018-04-01
Packaged: 2019-04-16 18:58:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,683
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14171406
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lonely_Deer/pseuds/Lonely_Deer
Summary: A Legends of Tomorrow Text Chatroom!I know this has been done before a couple of times, but I wanted to add to the insanity.(Also, sorry for the title; I didn't really know what to call it.)





	1. In The Beginning (There was a Chatroom?)

 

MONDAY: 02-04-18

(03:15 AM)

 ** _(Dr._ _Palmer Created the_ ** _'LoT CHaT (Communication Headquarters and Timetable)' **)**_

_**Dr. Palmer Added:** Dr. Heywood, Miss. Lance, Mr. Rory, Rip Hunter, Wally West, Director Sharpe, Miss. Jiwe, Miss. Tomaz_

_(03:16 AM)_

_**Dr. Palmer:**_ Hi guys! _  
_

_(03:20 AM)_

_**Mr. Rory:**_ the hell do you want, haircut

 _ **Mr. Rory:**_ its the middle of the fucking night

 _ **Dr. Palmer**_ _ **:**_  Oh, Hi Mick!

 ** _Dr. Palmer:_** And actually it's three in the morning.

_(03:22 AM)_

**_Miss. Lance:_** You're both wrong; it's twenty past three in the morning.

_(03:23 AM)_

**_Dr. Heywood:_** 3:23, to be precise.

 ** _Dr. Heywood:_** So you're all wrong.

 _ **Mr.Rory:**_ piss off, pretty.

 _ **Dr. Palmer:**_ Hi, Nate!

 ** _Dr. Heywood:_** Hey, Ray.

 _ **Dr. Palmer:**_ Heh, rhyme!

 **_(Miss. Lance Changed the chat to:_**  ' _Nate and Ray are so gay it hurts. And that's coming from me!' **)**_

_(03:25 AM)_

_**Rip Hunter:**_...

 ** _Rip Hunter:_** Why on earth are you all up so late/early?

 _ **Mr. Rory:**_ haircut woke me up

 ** _Miss. Lance:_** Same here.

 ** _Dr. Heywood:_** Yeah, sorry to stitch you up, Ray.

 ** _Dr. Palmer:_** No, it's alright; I shouldn't have woken you all up. I'm sorry.

 ** _Rip Hunter:_** What about you, Mr. Palmer? Why are you up so late?

 ** _Dr. Heywood:_** * _Dr._ Palmer

 _ **Mr. Rory:**_ yeah, stick up for your little boyfriend pretty

 ** _Dr. Heywood:_** OK, A: He's not my boyfriend

 ** _Dr. Heywood:_** B: I just believe that something as important as a PhD shouldn't just be ignored, especially if someone has worked very hard to get it.

 ** _Dr. Heywood:_** Hint hint nudge nudge Rip's a dick.

 ** _Rip Hunter:_**...

 _ **Miss. Tomaz:**_ Wow.

 ** _Miss. Lance:_** Someones a bit pissy.

 ** _Dr. Heywood:_** I'm extremely tired.

 _ **Miss. Tomaz:**_ Actually, yeah. Ray never answered Rip's-a-dick's question.

 ** _Rip Hunter:_** Please don't make that a thing.

**GIDEON: _Perhaps I could help answer the question._**

**_Miss. Tomaz:_** GIDEON!?

 ** _Miss. Lance:_** How the fuck...?

 ** _Dr. Heywood:_** Um... Hi?

 ** _Rip Hunter:_** And here I thought this couldn't get any worse.

 ** _Mr. Rory:_** nope

 ** _Dr. Palmer:_** Uh oh.

 **GIDEON: _Dr. Palmer here hasn't slept in 20 hours, and instead of doing something useful like sleeping he decided to make a group-ch_ _at._**  

  ** _Dr. Palmer:_** Hehe... Whoops.

 ** _Miss. Lance:_** Whoops?

 ** _Miss. Lance:_** Ray, I know this might be hard for you to believe but, people don't just forget to sleep.

 ** _Dr. Palmer:_**...

 ** _Dr. Palmer:_** They don't?

 ** _Miss. Lance:_** NO, THEY FUCKING DON'T.

 ** _Dr. Palmer:_** SORRY.

 ** _Miss. Jiwe:_** Yeah, Ray, that isn't very healthy. You should probably get that sorted.

  ** _Mr. Rory:_** everyone has flaws

  ** _Miss. Jiwe:_** Wow, Mick, that was kind of inspirational.

 ** _Mr. Rory:_** no, i just mean that its easier to drink yourself to death cuz its better to die on your own terms

 ** _Miss. Jiwe:_** ... oh.

 _ **Rip Hunter:**_ Finally, something I think the two of us can agree on.

 ** _Mr. Rory:_** im gonna go get another beer

 ** _Miss. Tomaz:_** I swear I'm surrounded by self-harming idiots.

 ** _Dr. Heywood:_** WOAH WOAH.

 ** _Dr. Heywood:_** YOU CAN'T SAY THAT.

 ** _Dr. Heywood:_** THAT'S WRONG.

 ** _Miss. Tomaz:_** No, what I meant was that I'm surrounded by people who happen to self-harm, who also happen to be idiots.

 ** _Miss. Tomaz:_** That's all I meant.

 ** _Dr. Heywood:_** Oh.

 ** _Dr. Heywood:_** Wait, I don't self-harm!

 ** _Miss. Tomaz:_** Mick does.

  ** _Miss. Tomaz:_** He won't stop drinking.

 ** _Miss. Tomaz:_** And I'm pretty sure Ray does.

 ** _Miss. Tomaz:_** I mean, he's obviously depressed.

 ** _Dr. Palmer:_** Wait, since when!?

 ** _Dr. Palmer:_** Apparently I've missed something.

 ** _Dr. Palmer:_** Help.

 ** _Dr. Palmer:_** Should I get medication for that?

  ** _Dr. Palmer:_** What if I've been depressed all my life and I just haven't noticed, and that's actually set me back in my progress, and I haven't truly reached my full potential as an adult?

 ** _Dr. Palmer:_** What if that explains so many of my mannerisms and habits and I just failed to notice because I'm terrible at noticing my own mental and health issues?

  ** _Miss. Lance:_** W H Y.

  ** _Miss. Lance:_** F U C K I N G  W H Y.

  ** _Miss. Tomaz:_** Oops.

 ** _Miss. Jiwe:_** I don't know about you guys, but I'm thinking that his anxiety might be more of the problem here.

 ** _Miss. Lance:_** S T O P.

 ** _Rip Hunter:_** I  _love_ this crew.

 _ **Mr. Rory:**_ i leave for one lousy minute

(03:50 AM)

 _ **Wally West:**_ Well.

 _ **Wally West:**_ Hi guys!

 _ **Wally West:**_ What did I miss? 

 ** _Miss. Lance:_**...

 ** _Miss. Lance:_** Goodnight all.

_**(MISS. LANCE IS OFFLINE)** _

**_Miss. Tomaz:_** Yeah... See you guys.

_**(MISS. TOMAZ IS OFFLINE)** _

**_Miss. Jiwe:_** Goodnight/Morning everyone. Sleep well!

_**(MISS. JIWE IS OFFLINE)** _

_**Mr. Rory:**_ see you later bitches

_**(MR. RORY IS OFFLINE)** _

_**Dr. Heywood:**_ Umm...

 _ **Dr. Heywood:**_ Goodnight Ray, sleep well. (Make sure you actually sleep.)

 _ **Dr. Heywood:**_ Oh, and Goodnight Wally.

_**(DR. HEYWOOD IS OFFLINE)** _

_**Rip Hunter:**_ I do not hope to see you all tomorrow.

 _ **(RIP HUNTER IS OFFLINE)**_  

  _ **Dr. Palmer:**_ Yeah...

  _ **Dr. Palmer:**_ Sorry Wally, I'll make sure to fill you in when I see you later.

 _ **Dr. Palmer:**_ Goodnight, and I hope you didn't get too annoyed by the chat notifications.

 _ **Wally West:**_ Nah, it's cool. See ya.

**_(DR. PALMER IS OFFLINE)_ **

(04:00 AM)

 ** _Director Sharpe:_**...

 ** _Director Sharpe:_** Nah.

_**(DIRECTOR SHARPE IS OFFLINE)** _

_**Wally West:**_ Aww.

_**(WALLY WEST IS OFFLINE)** _

  ** _CHAT_ : NATE AND RAY ARE SO GAY IT HURTS. AND THAT'S COMING FROM ME!  _IS OFFLINE._**

**GIDEON: _Goodnight, Team Legends._**


	2. Stage Two (What Happens Now?)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Part Two! (Later that day.)  
> Hope you guys like it!  
> (Oh, by the way: My tumblr is "smile-like-youre-gonna-die" if anyone's interested in having a chat about LoT)  
> :D

MONDAY: 02-04-18

(23:03 PM)

_**(WALLY WEST IS ONLINE)** _

_**Wally West:**_ Hey guys!

(23:04)

_**(DR. HEYWOOD IS ONLINE)** _

_**(DR. PALMER IS ONLINE)** _

_**Dr. Heywood:**_ Hey Wally, you good?

 _ **Dr. Heywood:**_ Oh, hi Ray.

 _ **Dr. Palmer:**_ Hiya Wally!

 _ **Dr. Palmer:**_ Hi, Nate!

**_(MISS. LANCE IS ONLINE)_ **

**_Miss. Lance:_** Are we still gonna use this Chat? I kinda thought that we would just forget about it.

 ** _Miss. Lance:_** That's what happened to the last Chat we had...

_**(MISS. TOMAZ IS ONLINE)** _

_**Miss. Tomaz:**_ Well, at least it isn't three in the morning this time.

 _ **Miss. Tomaz:**_ *Cough cough* This is why we don't leave Ray in charge of these things *Cough*

 _ **Dr. Palmer:**_ Okay, ow. I'm sorry.

 _ **Dr. Palmer:**_ At least I'm not one of the main reasons we got rid of the first Chat we made.

 ** _Miss. Lance:_** Okay, who are you and what have you done with Ray?

**_(MR. RORY IS ONLINE)_ **

**_Mr. Rory:_** well what ever youve done with him, you can keep him

 ** _Mr. Rory:_** i like this new haircut

 _ **Dr. Palmer:**_ Mick, you only like three things: Alcohol, fire and women/ men.

 _ **Dr. Palmer:**_ Alright that's four things but you get the point.

 ** _Mr. Rory:_** on second thoughts

  ** _(MISS. JIWE IS ONLINE)_**

 ** _Miss. Jiwe:_** Ho is everyone?

 ** _Miss. Jiwe:_** *How

 ** _Dr. Heywood:_** *How

 ** _Miss. Jiwe:_** Thank you, Nathaniel.

 ** _Dr. Heywood:_** You're... welcome?

**_(RIP HUNTER IS ONLINE)_ **

**_Rip Hunter:_** *Welcome

 ** _Rip Hunter:_** Grammer, please.

 _ **Dr. Palmer:**_ *Grammar. Why don't you try practising what you preach?

 _ **Miss. Tomaz:**_...

 _ **Miss. Tomaz:**_ Well damn.

 ** _Miss. Lance:_** Someone's on their period.

  _ **(RIP HUNTER IS OFFLINE)**_

 _ **Wally West:**_ Oh.

 _ **Wally West:**_ Um.

  _ **Wally West:**_ Should we... do something about that?

  ** _Miss. Lance:_** Nah, this used to happen a lot.

 ** _Dr. Heywood:_** Heh, more like a LoT.

 ** _Dr. Heywood:_** I guess we really can say R.i.p now, huh?

 _ **Wally West:**_ Nice one dude.

_**(MISS. JIWE HAS REMOVED DR. HEYWOOD FROM THE GROUP CHAT)** _

_**Wally West:**_ Aww.

_**(DR. PALMER HAS ADDED DR. HEYWOOD TO THE GROUP CHAT)** _

_**Dr. Heywood:**_ Thanks Ray.

 ** _Dr. Palmer:_** No worries.

**_(MISS. JIWE IS OFFLINE)_ **

**_Miss. Lance:_** Bye Amaya.

 _ **Wally West:**_ KISSKISSKISSKISSKISSKISSKISSKISSKISSKISSKISSKISS

 ** _Miss. Tomaz:_** KISSKISSKISSKISSKISSKISSKISSKISSKISSKISSKISSKISSKISS

**GIDEON: _KISSKISSKISSKISSKISSKISSKISSKISSKISSKISSKISS_**

_**Dr. Palmer:**_ Not you too, Gideon!

**GIDEON: _I'm sorry, Dr. Palmer._**

**GIDEON: _But you and Dr. Heywood would make an adorable couple._**

**_Miss. Tomaz:_** SEE. EVEN GIDEON SHIPS IT!

 _ **Dr. Heywood:**_ Oh boy.

 _ **Dr. Palmer:**_ Yup.

  ** _(DIRECTOR SHARPE IS ONLINE)_**

 ** _Director Sharpe:_** Alright, what did I miss?

 _ **Dr. Heywood:**_ SO WHAT DID I MISS?

 _ **Dr. Palmer:**_ WHAT DID I MISS?

 ** _Director Sharpe:_** VIRGINIA MY HOME SWEET HOME-

 _ **Dr. Heywood:**_ I WANNA GIVE YOU A KISS!

 _ **Dr. Palmer:**_ *Mwah*

_**DIRECTOR SHARPE HAS CHANGED NAME TO LOOKIN'SHARPE** _

_**Lookin'Sharpe:**_ That was fun.

 _ **Mr. Rory:**_ yuk. theatre kids.

**_MR. RORY HAS CHANGED NAME TO HELLFIRE_ **

**_Hellfire:_** much better

**_MISS. LANCE HAS CHANGED NAME TO SONGBIRD_ **

**_Songbird:_** I couldn't think of anything else.

**_MISS. TOMAZ HAS CHANGED NAME TO VIDEOGAMEMASTER_ **

**_VideoGameMaster:_** Suck on that, Wally.

**_WALLY WEST HAS CHANGED NAME TO INYOURDREAMSZARI_ **

**_InYourDreamsZari:_** I beat your highscores. I'm the video game master.

 ** _VideoGameMaster:_** YOU CHEATED.

**GIDEON: _Are you sure you all aren't just overgrown children?_**

**_Songbird:_** Nope.

**_(QRUD GDUKN IS ONLINE)_ **

**_Hellfire:_** the fuck is this

 ** _Dr. Palmer:_** Oh.

 ** _Dr. Palmer:_** Hi Nora.

  ** _Nora Darhk:_** Dammit Ray!

 ** _Nora Darhk:_** How could you tell?

 ** _Dr. Palmer:_** You just used the Caesar Cipher.

**_(_ _DR. HEYWOOD REMOVED NORA DARHK FROM THE GROUP CHAT)_**

**_Dr. Palmer:_** Oh.

 ** _Dr. Palmer:_** Bye Nora.

  _ **Dr. Heywood:**_ No way in hell I'm letting that bitch into this group Chat.

 ** _Dr. Palmer:_** Why?

 ** _Dr. Heywood:_** Ray, she literally tortured you.

 ** _Dr. Palmer:_** Well, yeah but at least she didn't kill me.

**_(RIP HUNTER IS ONLINE)_ **

**_RIP HUNTER HAS CHANGED NAME TO RESTINPEACE_ **

**_RestInPeace:_** Please tell me you haven't killed anyone yet.

_(23:19 PM)_

**_(MISS. JIWE IS ONLINE)_ **

**_MISS. JIWE HAS CHANGED NAME TO BEASTMODE_ **

**_BeastMode:_** I missed a lot, didn't I?

 _ **Dr. Heywood:**_ Hehe. Yeah, you did miss a LoT!

_**(BEASTMODE HAS REMOVED DR. HEYWOOD FROM THE GROUP CHAT)** _

_**Dr. Palmer:**_ This again?

_**(DR. PALMER HAS ADDED DR. HEYWOOD TO THE GROUP CHAT)** _

  _ **Dr. Heywood:**_ Thanks, man.

 _ **VideoGameMaster:**_ _Nate:_ Bro.

 ** _Songbird:_** _Ray:_ Yeah Bro?

 ** _InYourDreamsZari:_** _Nate:_ Like, no homo, but I'd totally fuck you.

 ** _BeastMode:_** _Ray:_ Thanks, Bro. No homo.

**_(DR. HEYWOOD IS OFFLINE)_ **

**_(DR. PALMER IS OFFLINE)_ **

_**Songbird:**_ Well.

 _ **BeastMode:**_ ...

 _ **InYourDreamsZari:**_  Are they... mad at us?

**_INYOURDREAMSZARI CHANGED THE CHAT NAME TO 'THEY ARE TOTALLY MAD AT US'_ **

**_VideoGameMaster:_** They didn't deny it.

**_SONGBIRD CHANGED THE CHAT NAME TO 'THEY ARE TOTALLY MAD AT US AND ARE GONNA FUCK LATER'_ **

**_Lookin'Sharpe:_** Why am I even in this chat?

 _ **RestInPeace:**_ I ask my self that too.

_**GIDEON: This is going to be one interesting conversation later.** _

_**CHAT:** _ **THEY ARE TOTALLY MAD AT US AND GONNA FUCK LATER _IS OFFLINE_**


End file.
